To have a successful relationship, you need to put in time and effort.
Despite what films and books may lead you to believe, no relationship is perfect. Indeed, relationships are easier when people fall in love with their soulmates; however, they still face challenges, obstacles, and difficult times. Few people truly know that relationships require hard work and effort. For this reason, many are often disappointed when they find themselves having to make sacrifices and compromises. This disappointment stems from the unrealistic expectations and demands people have when they dive into a new relationship.
There are 8 hard truths you need to accept if you want your relationship to last.
1. No relationship is perfect.
Everybody has flaws and nobody is perfect. It follows then that a relationship built by two people will also have flaws and faults. To live a happy and fulfilling life with your partner, you need to accept that your relationship will not be perfect. Having arguments and disagreeing with one another does not mean that you are wrong for each other; it means that you are human.
2. Your partner is not an extension of you.
If you view your partner as an extension of you rather than their own individual being, your relationship will not last. To have a successful relationship, you need to see your partner for exactly who they are: your partner. In other words, when two people are in a relationship, they need to be a team.
3. You do not have to be together 24/7.
Taking the previous point further, you and your partner are separate individuals who have different aspirations, hobbies, needs, etc. You cannot expect your partner to be around you 24/7 or enjoy all of the things you do. Being in a relationship does not mean erasing your individuality. It means being able to be yourself and knowing that your partner supports you. In a healthy relationship, both partners spend time alone and engage in activities that help them develop as separate individuals.
4. You have to be patient.
In order to have a happy and successful relationship, you need to learn how to be patient with your partner. No matter how much you love one another, you will often irritate and frustrate each other. This is normal and it does not mean that your relationship will not work. It just means that you need to be patient during these difficult times.
5. Your partner can hurt you even though they love you.
Sometimes, your partner will hurt you just like you will hurt them. However, this does not mean that you do not love one another. The truth is that we sometimes unintentionally hurt the people we love and care about. Just like your siblings, parents, and friends might say or do hurtful things, your partner will do so too. Be patient, kind, and forgiving. We all make mistakes.
6. Being in a relationship does not mean always being happy.
You will not always be happy. Life is challenging and it often presents us with difficult times and obstacles which we must overcome. During times like these, it is normal to be upset, hurt, or angry.
One of the most difficult things to accept is the fact that love is not always enough. Sometimes, no matter how much two people love each other, they cannot make their relationship work. This is true for people who want different things in life. Unfortunately, some compromises and sacrifices are too big to be made. For example, people often go their separate ways when one partner wants children while the other does not. In such cases, love is not enough.
8. You can fall out of love.
Although it is scary, it is also true that love can vanish. In the same way that you cannot choose to fall in love, you cannot choose to stay in it. For this reason, couples need to do everything they can to keep the spark alive. If you neglect your partner and take your relationship for granted, the spark can die and the love can vanish.
When you accept these hard truths, you will find yourself looking at your relationship and your partner in a new way. Love is not easy and there will be difficult times. However, the good moments will (and should) always outweigh the bad.