A lot of us love the fact they are having a romantic partner and not the person. That could happen because our parents irritatingly remind us we have to start a family or “find someone”.
Another reason is that having a romantic partner pumps up our ego.
Especially for men, it’s a matter of pride to have a beautiful girlfriend.
Sex is also a reason to start and stay in a relationship. Yes, sex is an essential part of love, but sadly in today’s hook-up culture it’s one of the major reasons to become romantically involved.
On top of that, the moral standards from the past that required people to be officially married to make love, aren’t valid. That means sex is easy to get. To have it often, you just need a relationship. Sadly such relationships are shallow and end quickly once the lust is gone.
So how can we know whether we are truly loved by our partner or not?
To help you find the answer we listed 17 red flags your partner isn’t really in love with you:
1. They don’t accept your real personality
It’s normal at the beginning of a relationship, that both of you don’t want to reveal a lot about your personalities to each other. But after a certain period, you should get to a point in your relationship where both can show your true colors without being judged.
Hence if after a year your partner can’t accept the real you – they don’t love you. And probably never will.
2. They are afraid of difficulties
It is necessary to put efforts to build a relationship that goes OK and is long lasting. Happy romantic partners are the ones who talk to each other, discuss problems, support each other and won’t be scared by the inevitable difficulties.
3. They don’t respect you
Everyone gets annoyed and could be nasty; however, if your partner is always treating you with disrespect it’s a red flag.
Feeling afraid because they criticize you often is another red flag that there isn’t affection and understanding between you.
4. They don’t care about your needs
If someone loves you, they’d try to make you happy and to take care of your wellbeing. Here’s the story of Kyla who recently broke with her partner because she didn’t feel loved.
I was constantly denied affection from my EX- If I needed a hug he would tell me he was too busy. Eventually, I split up with him and now I’m OK. My new boyfriend gives me a lot of time, cares and affection.
5. Lack of interest in you
If he or she is not interested in your likes, dislikes, and all that makes you who you are, they might not love you and only be excited about having a relationship.
6. You aren’t a priority
As love grows stronger the desire to see our significant other should be increasing. If, you don’t, however, seem to be a priority in your loved person’s life this could be a red flag.
7. The relationship isn’t strong
There’s no relationship without problems. Problems, (although they’re unpleasant ), are necessary for relationships to deepen. But if your partner doesn’t spend time strengthening the relationship, they may not be in love.
8. You haven’t got to know them well
If think you’re with someone who doesn’t love you truly, it’s better to take a step back and think again if this person is giving you what you need. Actually many of us fall in love without getting to know the partner well.
9. They expect too much
Although it’s great to be with a partner who motivates you if their expectations for you are too high this could become a problem. If they keep telling you can do better, and should change in some way, they might not love you. Your partner shouldn’t make you feel like you aren’t good enough.
10. You aren’t close
A significant other who loves you would share their secrets and weaknesses with you. If as time goes by you don’t become close and genuinely connected to them – this is a problem. It’s likely that you are just not in love.
11. They’re superficial
People want different things. Still, if your partner places value only on superficial qualities such as appearance, finances, status, and what the inside of your flat looks like the feelings they have for you aren’t true.
12. They’re reserved
If your partner seems conflicted or confused when you ask what they feel for you it’s a red flag. In some cases, they won’t say directly they don’t love you and would exhibit cold behavior towards you instead.
13. Change of routine
A change in routine may mean that your partner’s got some inner conflict they’re trying to deal with. If you notice they’ve taken up a new hobby or don’t want to see you as often as before, it may be a sign their love is fading away.
14. You don’t make love
If he or she refuses to have physical intimacy with you, something’s not OK. Avoiding physical contact and giving you different reasons that justify their behavior might mean they have stopped loving you.
15. Too focused on the past
They talk about your past experiences and not about the present. On top of that, they don’t make future plans with you. If this is the case, the love interest might be declining.
16. Not the right moment
Love comes if we’re ready and with the right person. If your partner is not the right or you aren’t mature enough to give true love – things aren’t going to work out.
17. Never apologize
If they make a mistake, they don’t apologize or try to make up to you. You shouldn’t be with someone who doesn’t care if they’ve caused you pain and wouldn’t say sorry.
The sooner you realize and accept that he or she doesn’t love you, the sooner you can let go of this imaginary love and start searching for the true one. It’s not going to be easy to get over the pain and disappointment but it is necessary to end a dead end relationship. Remember somewhere out there’s a person who will love you to the moon and give you all the you’ve ever dreamt of.
