When you are in a relationship, you might have moments of doubts about the future of you and your partner as a couple. These worries might also appear if you see your friends and family settle down, and you and your significant other are still at the “boyfriend-girlfriend stage” in your relationship.
So how can you know if you’ve found a committed partner and you are not wasting your time?
Is hearing “I love you” every day enough to be sure that you two would stay together in the long-haul?
To answer these questions, we consulted the professional opinions of different relationship experts and outlined 10 ways that go much deeper than saying “I Love You” your partner could use to show you are the one for them.
1. They accept you for who you are
Your significant other accepts who you are and respects you for this.
“You should also look for someone who cares about you at least as much as they care about themselves,” psychologist Nikki Martinez explains.
2. They care for you more than they care for themselves
Your happiness is even more important to them than their happiness, and they always try to be there for you and never complain about it.
“They do it out of love. Kindness, surprise, selflessness, are all good qualities.” If it’s a one-sided relationship it won’t last — and it shouldn’t.” adds Martinez.
3. You have the same values
That is one of the essential elements of a long-term relationship. Kimberly Hershenson, a licensed therapist, also supports this theory:
“Every relationship involves compromise, but if values are too different, it may be time to end the relationship and move on.”
So you have to be sure that you and your partner look in the same direction and have shared values and goals.
4. They show random acts of kindness and affection
Romantic gestures are important and reveal warm feelings but are not absolute proof that your partner is the one and only. What you have to look for is whether or not your partner shows random acts of love and affection. Here is what Anne-Marrie Foscolo couples counselor thinks about this:
“If he is free my husband would always call me to ask if I need a ride after work. So you need to pay attention to these daily things your partner does for you because after all, they are the important ones.”
5. They support you
The partners who stay together in the long-haul are the ones that support each other. So if you’ve found someone who is there for you every day, who encourages you all the time even for little things and believes in your dreams, then you might have found the one.
“The best possible thing you can get out of a relationship is that you’re with someone who encourages you to be the best version of yourself every day.” ~Nishan Panwar.
6. They remember everything about you (even the little details)
Here is the experience of one of the clients of Anne-Marrie Foscolo that she shared with us:
“Once my boyfriend and my sister were talking about the new song of a rap star that had just hit the charts, and when I tried to say something about it, he interrupted me and replied, “ooh, Sandra doesn’t listen to rap. She only likes Eminem .” That was true, but I don’t remember ever discussing it with him.”
So, if your significant other remembers every little detail about you, it means you matter to them a lot, and they really care for you.
7. They put their trust in you
Your relationship needs to be built on mutual trust. It is necessary that you trust your partner and that they trust you too. You need to be able to open up to each other without feeling embarrassed about it. That’s when you know they might be the one.
Remember, trust can’t exist if only one of the partners is honest and open. On top of that believing, each other could ensure that you respect the other one’s personal space which is as important as the time you spend together. Here is the opinion of relationship experts Liz and Linda, founders of The2ndDate matchmaking service:
“You aren’t co-dependent, you enjoy being on your own at times, but still miss each other when you are apart and look forward to being back together.”
8. You have arguments, but you always resolve them
Although fights and arguments are considered a bad thing because they might bring negativity and cause tension in the relationship it turns out this is not quite right. If you never argue with your partner, you might not be honest with each other. According to Anne-Marie Foscolo, a healthy long-term relationship involves two partners who feel free to express their disagreements with each other but always find a way to overcome the conflicts and resolve the misunderstandings.
9. They see their future with you
A vital sign that your partner loves you deeply and is committed to your relationship is if they include you in their plans and not only the short-term ones. They also cannot imagine living without you anymore. Here is the opinion of Anne-Marie Foscolo about this:
“If your partner says, they want to grow old with you or mention that they cannot imagine waking up without having you by their side this is a big sign they think you might be the one to spend their life with.”
10. They feel OK with your true colors
Another factor that reveals true love is whether you feel comfortable to be yourself when you are with your partner. If you do this means your partner is the right for you and you can be truly happy together. That is also confirmed by the certified counselor Jonathan Bennett:
“Being authentic is a key component of happiness and you want a partner that encourages it.”
Understanding if someone could be your long-term partner is difficult because very often people mistake attraction and passion for a lifetime love and feel disappointed when it turns out this is not the case. That is why you should be honest with yourself about how things between you and your significant other are going and pay attention to their behavior. Remember it’s not words but actions that reveal true love.
Do you agree that it takes actions and not words to prove love?
Please, share your opinion in the comments down below.