Being in love means being blinded by our emotions.
Even people skilled at identifying red flags and toxic behaviors often get burned by the people they love. That is, they allow themselves to be fooled and flattered by actions and words that are manipulative. Out of fear that we may lose the ones we love, many of us make excuses for their toxic behaviors. This means that even if (deep down) we know that we are being deceived, we choose to believe that we are loved. Subsequently, we interpret small gestures and empty promises as declarations of love when, in reality, we are being fooled.
There are three things that you should never let yourself feel flattered by.
1. Drunk dialing
Calling or texting when they are intoxicated does not mean they love you. Of course, it is easy to convince yourself that people’s true thoughts and feelings reveal themselves when they are drunk. However, more often than not, you will end up getting hurt as you realize that they are not declaring their love. If they wanted you, they would call and text you when they are sober.
2. Relying on you
This point is specific to the person who does not want to officially commit to you. Alternatively, they may also be your ex. In any case, this is someone who is not your partner but relies on you and treats you like you are special. This person always seeks your advice and knows that you will always be there for them. Unfortunately, while they may pretend as though you are special to them, they are most likely using you. If they loved you, they would not show up only when they need your help or advice.
3. Texting “I miss you”
Remember that if someone wants to see you, they will try everything that is in their power to do so. Often, those who say “I miss you” only do so every once in a while to make sure that you do not move on from them. Instead of falling for their lies, remind yourself that if they missed you, they would do more than send a text.
