What is misogyny?
Misogyny is defined as the hatred of women and the belief that women are inferior to men. According to Berit Brogaard D.M.Sci., Ph.D., misogyny is ‘typically an unconscious hatred that men form early in life, often as a result of a trauma involving a female figure they trusted’. This female figure could be their mother, sister, girlfriend, or even their teacher. When an important female figure betrays them or makes them feel neglected, they may subconsciously begin to develop misogynistic thoughts and emotions.
At first, these will not be easy to notice and the person himself might not even acknowledge them; however, further exposure to similar neglect or trauma can fuel these feelings further to the point of hatred. It is not always easy to spot a misogynist as this hatred towards women can present itself in both direct and indirect ways.
Taking this further, there are several ways to recognize a misogynistic man:
1. He is extremely competitive with women.
Being a competitive person does not make one misogynistic; however, if they are only or especially competitive when it comes to women, then they are probably a misogynist. This eagerness to win stems from their belief that since they are a man, they are naturally superior and so, they must win. Furthermore, when they lose to a woman, they feel as though their masculinity has been attacked.
2. He only keeps his word when it is given to a man.
To misogynists, a man’s time is more valuable than a woman’s. This, once again, stems from the belief that women are inferior and so, less important. Therefore, a misogynist will often fail to keep his promises to women and might even show up late for meetings (professional and personal). The key thing to note here is that with men, he always keeps his word and ensures that he is punctual.
3. He feels contempt for female leaders and politicians.
Misogynists tend to feel disdain for female leaders and politicians for no reason other than the fact that they are women. Subsequently, they may comment on their dress, bodies, and appearances in ways that they would not if they were talking about men. In addition to this, claiming that the only reason someone is as successful as they are is because they have slept their way to the top is an obvious sign of misogyny.
4. He makes ‘jokes’ about women and feminism.
Making indirect comments or jokes about women being inferior, less intelligent, or weaker than men is a red flag. Taking this further, this is also true for comments which suggest that women are only hired because feminism and gender equality ‘force’ companies to hire an equal number of men and women. These comments suggest that he does not believe women are actually qualified or capable.
5. He uses phrases like ‘don’t be such a girl’.
Unsurprisingly, those who use this phrase view being called a girl or a woman as offensive. Once again, this stems from the fact that they perceive women as inferior, weak, emotional, and even stupid.
6. He is controlling and possessive.
Misogynistic men view their partners as their property rather than independent individuals. For this reason, they believe they have the right to control them. In addition to this, a misogynist may even get angry if their girlfriend or spouse earns their own money as having their own source of income makes them more independent.
7. He treats his son and daughter differently.
Misogynists have double standards when it comes to their sons and daughters. There is a different set of rules for the two and this is made extremely clear as the son is given more freedom than the daughter. What is more, misogynistic fathers expect their sons to do better in school as they believe that their daughters will one day be taken care of by their husbands.
Of course, these are only some of the characteristics of misogynistic men and there are various other direct and indirect ways in which men can show their contempt for women.