What is intellectual compatibility?
Two partners can be compatible in numerous ways: spiritually, emotionally, sexually, socially, intellectually, etc. It is almost impossible to find two people who suit each other perfectly in every aspect; however, it is important to have a high degree of compatibility to have a successful, healthy, and long-lasting relationship. While many people understand the importance of emotional or physical compatibility, few understand how vital it is to be well-suited intellectually. Being intellectually compatible means feeling mentally stimulated and interested when you talk to one another. Speaking to Bustle, relationship coach and expert, Jenna Ponaman, CPC commented on the importance of this:
One person may be sexually compatible with their partner, but if they don’t find them interesting on a more intellectual level, the ability to make this a thriving lasting serious relationship is slim.
There are 6 signs that you and your partner are intellectually compatible.
1. You learn from one another.
If your partner’s knowledge interests you, sparks your curiosity and encourages you to learn more, then you probably feel mentally stimulated by them. If they feel the same way too, then you are intellectually compatible. In relationships where people are not intellectually well-suited, one partner always feels like a teacher while the other feels inferior.
2. You challenge and respect one another.
In order to grow, people need to challenge one another. If you and your partner can have debates that make you think about your values and beliefs on a deeper level, you are compatible. Discussing topics such as religion, culture, politics, etc., without getting frustrated or angry at one another allows you to build a strong connection and a healthy relationship.
3. You do not get bored of each other.
Intellectually incompatible partners cannot build a long-lasting relationship as, more often than not, one or both people become bored. This means that they begin to seek intellectual stimulation from friends or family as they cannot talk to their partner. A couple that is well-suited intellectually will never get bored as they can talk for hours and explore various topics without losing interest.
4. Your partner does not judge your views.
When you are with the person who is right for you, your self-confidence will increase. The reason for this is that you will begin to feel more comfortable expressing your opinions, thoughts, and views as you know that your partner will never judge you. Indeed, they may challenge your views, but they will never criticize you for them.
5. You do not compete with each other.
While there is nothing wrong with a little competition, constantly trying to prove that you (and your views) are right can be destructive. Admittedly, having a competitive partner can help challenge you; however, being in a relationship with someone who always tries to one-up you is exhausting. Nina Rubin, M.A., tells Bustle that your partner should be your ally, not your adversary.
6. The physical aspect of your relationship is not the most important.
Of course, being physically compatible is also necessary for a relationship to be successful. However, when you and your partner are more interested in each other’s minds than bodies, you can know for definite that you are intellectually compatible.
