Why Being Lonely as an Introvert Looks Different

Regardless of the type of personality you have, whether you are an introvert, an extrovert, or perhaps an ambivert, loneliness always feels suffocating.

But in the introverts’ case, it can be a lot more complicating because they get lonely not from the lack of people, but from the lack of connection. Truthfully, this can be much more challenging to overcome.

Unfortunately, the current global situation deprives us exactly of that – the feeling of being truly connected to one another.

Some of us haven’t seen their friends, even their family, for months now due to the COVID-19 pandemic. The ongoing lockdown has taken a toll on our lives, and all kinds of social media cannot replace the feeling of being in touch with the people we care for.

Since introverts are individuals who deeply cherish the value of meaningful connections, this time of isolation severely harms their inner peace. Don’t get this wrong – introverts do love and appreciate their alone time, but sometimes they need to be around people they hold dear, just like we all do. The virtual world, sadly, does not give them the level of connection they need, which makes them feel even more alienated. And this is a feeling introverts experience quite different from others.

To dive deeper into an introvert’s world, you should know that for them, being alone and being lonely are two entirely different things.

As already mentioned, introverts love spending time alone. In fact, they need to spend time on their own for the sake of their mental well-being. It gives them the chance to recharge and unwind. During that time, they don’t feel lonely because they spend it nurturing the connection they have with themselves.

Likewise, introverts also love having meaningful connections with people they treasure. They get excited when they have the chance to talk to someone who inspires them, while also giving them the freedom to be themselves.

Unfortunately, these days suchlike special interactions are nearly impossible without video calls, which can feel like little nightmares leaving you anxious and powerless for the rest of the day. After all, it is a well-known fact that introverts prefer texting over phone calls, which explains why they can get so resentful about video calls.

But how can introverts deal with loneliness in such difficult times? How can they bring back the sense of a real connection they so desperately crave?

Introvert Dear suggests a few ways you can cope with loneliness, even during the pandemic.

Here are 3 things you can do to overcome loneliness as an introvert: 

1. Focus on helping someone else.

When you feel lonely, you usually concentrate on yourself. You get caught up in negative, energy-draining thoughts that suffocate you. You feel trapped in your own mind. But if you focus this energy on helping someone else, you might forget about feeling lonely for a while.

Being of service to another person will distract you from the void you feel on the inside. It could be anyone – a friend who also feels desolated, a colleague who is going through certain challenges in their life, or a family member you haven’t heard from for a long time. Letting them know they are not alone in this will help you battle your own feelings of emptiness.

You don’t have to go out of your way to reach out to someone who is going through the same. All you need to do is write them a simple text to let them know you care. And if this someone feels the same way about you, they will surely give the favor back.

2. Write your thoughts down.

Journaling is a well-known form of meditation. It helps you get in touch with your emotions and discover the real reasons why you experience them with such intensity. Since loneliness can also be triggered by the disconnection you feel with yourself, writing your feelings down can serve as a way to reconnect with yourself and start taking better care of the relationship you have with your own mind.

Besides, sometimes the best way to deal with something is to get to the bottom of it. The same goes for feelings and emotions. Journaling about all the things that make you feel anxious, lonely, and depressed will provide you with valuable knowledge of the factors that affect your mental health. It will reveal a pattern of things, situations, and people, that play a role in disrupting your inner peace. What’s more, over time, it will make you understand why you feel so alienated during certain circumstances, which will definitely help you cope with the loneliness that consumes you.

3. Get yourself a pen pal. 

This one might sound a little old-fashioned, but if nothing else works, giving it a chance wouldn’t hurt. Having someone to confide to, even through writing, allows you to open up about your feelings and let the negative emotions go.

And the best thing about communicating through mail, whether you’re using e-mails or the good ol’ snail mail, is that you have all the time you need to gather your thoughts and respond without any pressure. Moreover, it also gives you a special feeling of excitement when you’re waiting for your pal to respond.

All you need to do is pick a dear friend, someone you know is fond of expressing their thoughts through writing, and let them know what you are striving to achieve through this type of conversing. Not only will this get your mind off of the pandemic and the loneliness it triggers, but it will also serve as a fun activity in these mundane, soul-draining times.

Do you consider yourself an introvert? What do you do to combat loneliness? Let us know in the comment section! 

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