We live in an era where narcissists are winning at life, while genuine people are being manipulated and mentally abused every day.
But why are we still allowing toxic individuals to ruin our lives and destroy our perception of reality? Why are we so blind to the obvious signs warning us that we might be victims of devious manipulators?
Perhaps we don’t recognize the signs, because narcissists often play the victim card themselves, fooling everyone else that they are the ones who need to be saved.
How do narcissists convince everyone of their false innocence?
The main thing all manipulators strive for, including narcissists, gaslighters, and other toxic individuals, is to avoid taking responsibility for their actions at all costs. They use any opportunity they have to blame someone else for their mistakes. And if that doesn’t work, they act utterly ignorant when confronted about the wrongdoings they have caused.
Narcissists will go out of their way to present themselves as the victim. They are capable of twisting the truth to the point where you will have to apologize to them. Moreover, they can make you feel guilty for overreacting and being too sensitive in situations where you have all the rights to be angry at them. This is their way of taking advantage of your compassionate soul.
By playing the victim card, suchlike toxic people are intentionally triggering your natural empathetic responses.
They use this strategy to distract you from the real issue and shift your focus towards the way your reactions are making them feel. This way, they distort the situation and make it look like you are the villain in the story. Eventually, they manage to make you feel remorseful for things you have no control over, and for mistakes that are not yours.
Why do we keep forgiving narcissists?
Although narcissists lack empathy and have no idea what the essence of compassion is, they are well-aware that they can control others by using their sympathetic nature. When we let emotions take over, we often forget to defend ourselves from those whose intentions are far from sincere. And as we fail to preserve ourselves, we allow these deceitful people to play with our feelings. Unfortunately, narcissists are too good at that game.
The second a narcissist detects you are letting your guard down, they immediately start working on figuring out ways to make you forgive and forget as soon as possible. Oftentimes, they present themselves as the ones who got hurt, even though they were the ones who hurt you.
By playing the role of the helpless, suffering one in the situation, they make you feel guilty for not being understanding enough to see their pain. They attack you by claiming that you are the self-absorbed one who couldn’t care less about their emotions. So, you have nothing left to do but to back up and not only forgive them but also apologize for being too selfish. As contradictory as this may sound, it is the narcissists’ way of instilling guilt in others by projecting their own feelings onto them.
Hopefully, now that you know how narcissists manage to trick us into believing in their false innocence, you will be able to avoid falling into their diabolical traps. Some people will go to extremes to take advantage of your kind heart. However, you are strong enough to see through their mind-controlling games and protect yourself from their toxic influence. Never forget that!