Are you truly in love with your partner or are you simply attached to them?
Love isn’t easy, but this article clears up the differences between true love and mere attachment.
Hopefully, these explanations will help you in nurturing your relationship or creating one based on genuine love in the years to come.
1. Love is passionate, attachment is indifferent
People say that the closest thing to love is hate, and this is why after you break up with someone, all that wonderful, selfless love transforms into raging, passionate, and undescribable hate.
When you’re attached to someone, on the other hand, you never really go through that rage. You may become paranoid, irritated, and a little anxious, but never let those feelings confuse you for something as strong as real hate.
2. Love is selfless, while attachment is selfish
When you’re deeply in love, you exist for the other person. For the first time in your life, you put your own needs behind and put your partner’s needs first.
But when it’s just attachment, you only want someone around you. You’re not looking out for them — you’re looking out for yourself.
The only reason you’re buying this person a set of training shoes is so you don’t have to go to the gym on your own anymore. Everything you do for them is a little bit about you.
3. Love is freeing, while attachment is possessive
When in love, you do not need your partner to be constantly around to feel safe. You don’t need to be next to each other to understand how he or she feels. You don’t need to wonder about their feelings and don’t have a reason to be jealous.
When it’s just attachment, you cannot hope to have a hold on your partner’s feelings because the only time you feel safe is when you two are together. When you’re apart from each other, you cannot help but suspiciously wonder what he or she is doing.
4. Love gives you power, while attachment is only about power
True love gives you wings, it makes you feel like you can do anything. It gives you an unimaginable sense of freedom coupled with rejuvenating energy. You feel alive and ready to take on all that life has to throw at you.
But when it’s just attachment, it becomes nothing but a struggle for power. You want to make certain you’re the one in the relationship that doesn’t get left behind. You are the person who makes the decisions and you’re the one with the key to the handcuffs.
5. Love is not bound by the constraints of time; attachment is an hourglass
When you’re in love, whether or not it works out, this person will always be the love of your life.
Attachment always has a deadline, it’s always on standby, like a limbo for true love.
At some point, one or both of you will find true love and all that attachment will fall off as quickly as it was put on.
Real love, on the other hand, stays with you until the end of times.
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