A marriage requires a lot of effort and devotion to be wholesome for both of the partners. It is no bed of roses to always keep it healthy over the course of months, years, or even decades.
Probably the biggest mistake spouses do is to take each other for granted.
They get so used to each other, that they forget to take care of their relationship. Here are 10 subtle signs you’re taking your partner for granted, and a few tips on what to do to stop it.
1. You forget to show them gratitude.
It’s one thing to feel grateful for the things your spouse does for you, and another to actually show it. They can’t truly feel your gratitude if you don’t express it. After all, they may know you well, but they can’t read your mind. You should make sure that whenever your partner does something nice or generous for you, you show them how grateful you are to have them in your life. A simple “Thank you” can do wonders.
2. You think they know what’s going on in your head.
Even though you’ve been together for quite a long time, your partner is not a magician or a psychic. They can’t possibly know exactly how you feel if you don’t tell them. That’s why, if you believe this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, you need to open up and be willing to talk things through.
3. You assume they know you love them.
Indeed, a marriage is founded on love and mutual respect. However, you should never stop declaring your love for your spouse. Though, sometimes the three magical words are not enough. If you start prioritizing the health and prosperity of your relationship, you will definitely find other ways to express your feelings for your partner. For instance, you can set regular dates, or start making your loved one breakfast in bed at least once a week. If you truly love your significant other, the effort you would need to make would be absolutely worth it.
4. You expect them to take care of certain tasks.
Although your husband or wife might be better than you in certain tasks, you shouldn’t automatically expect them to always handle them. Well, unless you have an agreement that each of you will always do the things you are better at. For example, even if your spouse is a better cook, it wouldn’t hurt if you make dinner once in a while. That extra step will show them that you are willing to invest in your relationship as much as they are.
5. You make important decisions without consulting with them.
Of course, you should have a refined line between your work and your personal life. However, when it comes to making big decisions about your career, for example, you need to consult with your partner. They take a significant part of your life, and they deserve to know about your plans. Besides, by sharing your ideas with them, they can show you the support you need to make the big step you’re so afraid to take.
6. You don’t compromise.
You have to be willing to compromise, otherwise, you will surely lose the balance in your relationship. In case your partner is always the one choosing to step back and let things go your way, you should definitely do something to change that. When only one of the spouses is willing to put effort into keeping the peace in the marriage, they often feel unappreciated.
7. You don’t pay attention while they’re talking to you.
This is something you should avoid doing not only with your partner but with other people too. When someone is telling you something, they expect you to pay attention to what they’re saying. Constantly checking the time, or looking at your phone while having a conversation with your spouse is extremely disrespectful. As you expect them to listen to you when you’re speaking, be sure you do the same for them.
8. You let them take care of the children.
Parenthood, just like the marriage, is founded on partnership and mutual support. You shouldn’t look at your children as an unpleasant chore you have to deal with. And you shouldn’t leave all the work and cares for your partner. Children require a lot of responsibility, awareness, affection, and love. It is all too much for one person to maintain, so be there for your spouse and your children, as much as they need you. After all, you’re in this together.
9. You don’t care about your appearance.
Honestly, why do people in long-term relationships or marriages stop putting effort into looking good and polished? Just because you and your significant other have been together for a long time, doesn’t mean you should stop trying to impress them with your looks. Your partner needs to know that you care about being attractive to them. Going that extra mile will definitely make your loved one forget to take their eyes off you.
10. You don’t check on them.
Even if you live together, even if you see each other every day, don’t forget to check on them. But don’t just ask them about their day. Ask them how they feel, what they dream about, where does their mind wander. Text them throughout the day to see how they’re doing. Make them truly feel your devotion to them and your relationship.
