“I mean, maybe under the surface, somewhere that’s hard to see, I’ve known it had to end for a long time. I just never thought I’d be the one to end it,” wrote Susane Colasanti in Waiting for You.
Is it possible you know on some level that your relationship is ending, but are fighting against that knowledge with every fiber of your being?
Your partner may have lost the will to contribute to your relationship, but still insist on keeping you for themselves in a way that is selfish and unfair. If this is the case, it’s time to cut yourself loose.
Here are 25 signs that your partner is no longer invested in your relationship:
1. You’re anxious and self-conscious with your partner more often than you’re happy.
2. They sometimes forget when you’ve made plans together. You often feel the need to remind them.
3. They criticize you often and unnecessarily.
4. They only come around when they need support – emotional, financial, or otherwise.
5. You don’t fight, because you’re afraid to disagree with them. Arguments are usually one-sided and unfair.
6. Your partner uses demeaning or dismissive body language. This might include eye rolling, sighing, or turning their back to ignore you.
7. Most of your dates begin very late at night. They always end in sex.
8. They are always busy. You only hang out at their sporadic convenience.
9. You often wonder if your partner is cheating on you.
10. They become another person when they are around their family and friends. They act totally different when the two of you are alone.
11. They don’t like to talk about the future.
12. You know absolutely everything about your partner, because they are your primary topic of conversation. You’re not sure they even know your middle name.
13. Your partner treats random strangers with more tenderness and care than they treat you.
14. You are more likely to reach your partner’s voicemail than their actual voice.
15. Your partner becomes bored and disinterested when you discuss things that are important to you. They might even shut down the conversation entirely.
16. You never hang out without drinking or doing drugs.
17. They apologize easily, but don’t change their behavior.
18. They are overly protective of their phone and computer passwords.
19. Your partner shows little interest in your friends and family members.
20. They don’t ask about your problems, and tell you they don’t like hearing you complain.
21. Your partner seems to have an excuse for everything.
22. They make no effort to include you in plans with their friends or family. In fact, there are important people in their life you have never met at all.
23. They bring out the worst in you.
24. You feel as though you need their permission for everything.
25. They blame all of the problems in your relationship on you. They refuse to take any accountability.
So – is this the end of your relationship, and its place in your world? Is it time to begin a new chapter? As C. JoyBell C. answered, “No, this is not the beginning of a new chapter in my life; this is the beginning of a new book! That first book is already closed, ended, and tossed into the seas; this new book is newly opened, has just begun! Look, it is the first page! And it is a beautiful one!” If you identified with the dynamics listed above, it’s time to let that loser go.
You deserve a better, brighter love that fills you up instead of tearing you down.
Free yourself up to find it!