Going through the countless challenges life brings you is never easy.
Having to do it on your own is even harder. But hurting your loved ones while battling your own demons can never help you heal.
There is nothing wrong with feeling lost in times of despair. All this chaos you’re going through is sometimes too much to handle, so it’s okay to feel the way you do. It’s okay to express your emotions and to need some time alone. You don’t need to pretend everything is fine when it obviously isn’t. But no matter how you choose to cope up with your trauma, make sure your actions or words don’t harm the ones who care for you.
Here are 7 self-help tips on how to heal from your personal trauma without hurting your loved ones:
1. Just breathe.
Inhale and exhale. Give your mind a rest by focusing on your breathing. Allow both your body and mind to work in harmony. A simple breathing exercise can help you appreciate the present moment and reconnect with yourself.
2. Acknowledge and accept your emotions.
Don’t try to hide your feelings. Don’t put a stone-cold face on whenever you sense you’re starting to get emotional. Instead, try to identify whatever it is you’re feeling at the moment and accept it as a part of you. It’s okay not to be okay. Never forget that.
3. Take a break from reality.
When you feel emotionally exhausted, then it’s time for you to take a well-deserved break both mentally and physically. Allow yourself to take a step back from anything that makes you feel helpless and unworthy. Give your tired mind time to regain its power.
4. Know that you can love someone and still be angry at them.
Live has nothing to do with anger. Sometimes, we get the angriest at the people we love the most. We have disagreements and fights with the ones we can’t live without. It’s the closeness we have with these people that makes us feel like they can take anything, so, at times, we just let ourselves act out. But being mad at them doesn’t mean we stop loving them. When anger tries to take over, forgiveness is always the key.
5. Be patient.
Patience doesn’t have to mean waiting for the storm to go away. It could mean being more empathetic towards yourself. It could also mean being more compassionate with the ones around you, even when it seems impossible. The least we can do in times of despair is to try to understand the situation and put ourselves in the shoes of the people who made us feel that way. However, this is undoubtedly a difficult process that requires lots of patience and self-control.
“Patience is not passive waiting. Patience is active acceptance of the process required to attain your goals and dreams.”
Ray A. Davis
6. Accept the ups and downs of life.
Life is a wonderfully horrible mixture of ups and downs. When you feel at your lowest, there is always something that surprises you and makes your days brighter. As they say, you can’t have a rainbow without a little rain.
7. Practice gratitude.
Even in the darkest hours, there is always something that gives you a reason to be grateful. Learning how to appreciate even the smallest things that make your life a little better is crucial. You opened your eyes in the morning. You have a family that supports you, friends who are always there for you, or a partner that deeply loves you. If you are reading this, you have eyes that let you see the world around you in all of its forms. You are a capable human being. There is power in gratitude, and soon enough, you will feel it. So, count your blessings, and be thankful for everything you have.