We have all been hurt by fake friends at least once in our lives.
We have all had our hearts broken by people who appear trustworthy at first but stab us in the back the moment they have a chance. These frauds use our kindness against us, making us believe we can be vulnerable around them. Meanwhile, all they want to achieve is to take advantage of us whenever they please.
Whether they are immature mean girls, frenemies, bullies who behave friendly only when no one else is around, they all have common behavioral patterns that can help you avoid another hurtful fake friendship.
Check out these 8 characteristics of fake friends to have a better knowledge of their kind and avoid letting them in your inner circle.
1. Fake friends can’t be trusted.
One of the foundations of a good friendship is being able to trust each other unconditionally. If the trust is not there, calling someone a friend will have no significant meaning. Real friends keep each other’s secrets, have each other’s backs, and never talk behind one another’s backs. On the contrary, fake friends are capable of all of these things and more. If you can’t trust the person you believe is your friend, they are most probably faking their part.
2. They are extremely selfish.
We all have certain episodes where we act a little too selfish. But then we realize the wrongfulness of our attitude and have the decency to apologize for it. However, fake friends behave selfishly all the time. They call you only when they need you, and refuse to make compromises regardless of the situation. Besides, they always want things to go their way, and when it doesn’t happen, they get disturbingly frustrated.
3. Fake friends lie.
This isn’t a surprise, right? People who pretend to be your friends only to take advantage of you will surely lie their way to your soul. They will lie about their interests to match yours, they will embellish their achievements to impress you, and they will manipulate you into thinking they have your best interest at heart. If you catch someone in multiple lies, better be cautious around them and avoid sharing personal details of your life.
4. They live for gossip and drama.
Real friends strive to avoid drama, intrigues, and gossips. They don’t spread rumors or tell others’ secrets to people who might take advantage of such private information. On the other hand, fake friends live for these things. They love seeing others’ lives fall apart. And if the drama isn’t as intriguing as they want it to be, they won’t hesitate to spread rumors to make things worse.
5. Fake friends envy you.
If a friend of yours always undermines your success and often kills your happiness with hurtful comments, they are most probably jealous. Seeing you happy makes them feel bad about themselves, which is a clear sign they are not real with you. A good friend will be glad to see you succeed. They will congratulate you on your achievements and will encourage you to aim even higher. The difference is tremendous.
6. They make you pretend to be someone else.
A huge red flag indicating that you’re wasting your time on a fake friend is that they somehow make you feel uncomfortable in your own skin. You just can’t be yourself around them. You put a mask on and fake a whole new persona that has almost nothing to do with your true self. What you need to understand is that true friends will like you for who you are.
7. Fake friends sell you out.
Unfortunately, we realize we’ve been surrounded by fake friends the moment they sell us out to save their own skin. In the face of possible danger, they choose to betray you instead of back you up. Only a real friend never leaves your side, even if it means they will have to risk themselves.
8. They are constantly criticizing you.
No matter how good at taking criticism you are, their constant judgment can drastically decrease your self-esteem. Even when they’re trying to convince you they are only being honest with you for your own good, you can sometimes sense they are doing it on purpose. They might still want to see you do good but never better than them. Contrarily, a true friend will help you throughout the rough patches and will encourage you to right all your wrongs.
Someone once said: “Friends are supposed to be there for you when you cry, not the reason you cry.” If you can’t trust them your secrets, if you feel the need to act differently around them, or if they constantly put you down and make you feel bad about yourself, they aren’t your friends. Let that sink in.
