Energy vampires: 5 ways to deal with people who emotionally drain you
They are everywhere: Energy vampires who suck all the positivity out of us in order to fuel their insatiable hunger for negativity, leaving us drained, weary, and sad.
Whatever you want to call them – energy vampires, or simply unhappy, negative people – they can destabilize your life if you do not have effective methods to deal with them.
There is no reason to allow their problems to become yours.
Here are five ways to deal with people who emotionally drain you.
1. Do not give them a chance to enter your life!
If an emotional vampire starts knocking on your office door, or social media door or whatever else, do not let them in.
If they start a neverending monologue about how unfair and cruel life has been to them, and how disgrace seems to follow them everywhere they go, just slam the door (well, maybe not the real door but the proverbial one). Ask them politely but with conviction, if they would be willing to change the subject to a merrier one.
But whatever you do, don’t give them advice or try to make them feel better if you’ve tried it before and all they did was shut down your advice so they could keep complaining. It won’t do anything but exhaust and frustrate you.
Set your boundaries and make them understand that you are not willing to drown in pity along with them and you will not succumb to negativity time and time again.
2. Learn to recognize them early on
Energy vampires are not always visible. On a first encounter, their weirdness may intrigue you, their gossip stories may leave you wanting to hear more, their overdramatization of things may entertain you, or their tough luck stories may draw you in. As time goes by, however, you start realizing that something isn’t quite right. Do not ignore your gut feeling. If you find yourself going through a loss of energy, headaches, irritability, muscle tensions, sadness, confusion, or negativity, you may have fallen victim to an energy vampire.
3. Give yourself time to recharge
If you have no other choice but to deal with an energy drainer, such as a colleague you have to interact with, try neutralizing their negative effect.
After a painful meeting with Eugene the Complainer, you might feel like you were smacked in the face with a shovel.
Whether it is meditation, hitting the gym, or watching funny videos on the web, do whatever you need to do to bring back those positive vibes! In this way, Eugene the Complainer will have no power over you.
4. Tell them to look in the mirror
Sometimes people don’t realize how bad it’s gotten until we let them know; we have spent so much energy and time listening, advising, and helping them that when their vampire sucking gets out of control the process has been so gradual that they have lost the sense of who they were before they became the emotionally draining people they are now.
In these situations, when you are close enough to a person, say “Listen, I don’t want to make you upset because I understand you’re having a difficult time but any time you go on these negative tirades I feel………..”. This will help them understand that they are not only hurting themselves but maybe even hurting their loved ones or losing people they value.
5. Put some distance between you two
If an energy vampire just won’t let go of you, it is your duty to put yourself first.
Your emotional wellbeing is perhaps the most important asset you possess, so putting it at risk for a person who feeds on the negatives of life is highly dangerous since it can deeply affect your mental health.
Positive surroundings help us become more active, productive and overall happier, whereas negative environments make it harder to sail through our daily lives. Manipulators, narcissists, and other negative presences that cause you pain or drain your energy should not be welcome in your home!
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