Is it wrong for a 7-year-old to comment on someone’s appearance?
Children are and always will be curious. Subsequently, it is to be expected that they will make mistakes and unintentionally hurt people’s feelings with the bold comments that they make. For this reason, it is up to their parents to teach them the right values, morals, and manners. Taking a case in point, the father of a 7-year-old boy was left wondering whether he is wrong for defending his son after he called a teacher fat. The dad (@SnooRecipes9487) shared his story on Reddit’s AITA (Am I The A**hole) forum.
My 7yo son’s teacher wrote me a nasty email on Monday about how he called another teacher “fat.” As I got more information about the situation, the more I realized that the teacher overreacted. His class was walking in line and my son’s teacher from last year walked by. My son asked his current teacher if she was pregnant. His current teacher said no and why would he asked that. My son said because she was fat. She told him that she wasn’t pregnant and that wasn’t nice to call people fat. My son was confused.
This would have been the perfect moment to teach his son not to comment on a person’s appearance.
Up until now, the dad’s story seems normal as he describes a common mistake children make; that is, without even realizing it, the little boy has made a bold, hurtful, and rude comment. One expects that a parent would use a moment like this to teach their child that it is wrong to comment on people’s appearances. However, as the story progresses, we realize that the father has no intention of teaching his son what is right and what is wrong. What is worse, we realize that the father does not even see that his child has made a mistake!
I asked his current teacher what the big deal was. He wasn’t trying to mean or funny. He’s 7. It was an honest and curious question that a 7yo would ask and that I would think a teacher who teaches them would understand that. She said it was besides the point and I should discuss with him about how making comments about people’s appearances can hurt feelings. I told her she was stretching it a bit and if she was asking me to discuss bullshit like body acceptance or whatever with a 7yo. Get real.
At the end of the story, the boy’s father reveals his true colors as he writes:
Finally she said that people come in all sizes and kids should learn not to judge them or assume they’re pregnant. I told her I was busy and she sounded like she had a personal problem. And yes, she is a bit tubby.
On the AITA forum, Redditors can judge the original poster’s actions.
Redditors are asked to vote from one of the following four options:
- NTA – Not The A**hole
- YTA – You’re The A**hole
- NAH – No A**holes Here
- ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
As expected, the majority of Redditors voted YTA.
The post has received over 1,000 replies in the past 24 hours with most of the responses claiming that the father is definitely in the wrong. What is more, they agreed that it is not the child’s fault but rather the parent’s.
YTA.
Your son’s teacher isn’t asking you to teach your son about the body acceptance movement. Your son’s teacher is asking you to teach your son about basic decency.
But judging from that last, entirely unnecessary, comment that you made about the teacher’s weight, I’m guessing no one has ever taught you about basic decency either.
– JDPGhost
you had me until you started talking about “body acceptance bullshit” and then making remarks about his teacher’s appearance. Is it a fair question for a 7yo? yes. Did he mean to be rude? no. Are you being mean and rude by bringing up his teacher’s appearance when it has no bearing on the situation? yes! Sounds like someone needs to have a talk with you about not making fun of appearances before you’d be qualified to have a talk with your son about it YTA
YTA. Your son was being honest & curious. You, however, are just being rude. This is an opportunity to teach your son how to act around other people, which is part of the teacher’s job, but it’s definitely your job. You dismissed what the teacher was telling you because 1) it was critical of your child, & 2) you think someone “a little tubby” can’t possibly be right, I can see why it is tough for you to teach your child to respect others.
– YMMV-But