We compiled a list of the most clever jokes supposedly only the most intelligent individuals would understand.
Feel free to share them at will. We won’t be upset 😉
1. A photon checks into a hotel. The bellhop asks, “Can I help you with your luggage?” It replies, “I don’t have any. I’m traveling light.”
It’s funny because: “Traveling light” is a phrase used to indicate traveling without much (or any) baggage. In science, a photon is a particle of light that is almost always moving.
2. Heard about that new band called 1023 MB? They haven’t had any gigs yet.
It’s funny because: A gigabyte is a measure of data that is the equivalent of 1024 MB. As it becomes clear in the joke, the band is only 1023 MB and they haven’t had any “gigs” yet.
3. A biologist, a chemist, and a statistician are out hunting.
The biologist shoots at a deer and misses 5 feet to the left. The chemist takes a shot and misses 5 feet to the right. The statistician yells, “We got ‘em!”
It’s funny because: A statistician is someone who works with theoretical or applied statistics. They are often involved in calculating averages. In mathematics, +5 and -5 average out to zero. The point of the joke is the statistician took the average of both shots and assumed they hit the target.
4. Heisenberg was speeding down the highway.
A cop pulls him over and says “Do you have any idea how fast you were going back there?” Heisenberg says, “No, but I knew where I was.”
It’s funny because: Werner Heisenberg was a German physicist and one of the most notable figures in the field of quantum theory. He coined the “Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle”, and according to it, we can know either where a quantum particle is or how fast it is moving, but it is not possible to know both at the same time.
5. Question: Why do engineers confuse Halloween and Christmas? A: Because Oct. 31 = Dec. 25.
It’s funny because: The joke involves two number systems called Octal and Decimal. Octal 31 (often abbreviated to Oct. 31) equals Decimal 25 (or Dec. 25), and vice versa. Because they can resemble month abbreviations, it often appears as Oct. 31 = Dec. 25.
6. If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate.
It’s funny because: You were likely expecting the word “problem,” but the jokester has replaced it with “precipitate,” which is the solid that forms in a solution of liquid after a chemical reaction occurs.
7. A logician’s wife is having a baby. The doctor immediately hands the newborn to the dad. The wife says, “Is it a boy or a girl?” The logician says, “Yes.”
It’s funny because: Processing such a question through Boolean logic, “yes” is correct technically. So… it’s…funny…
8. A linguistics professor says during a lecture that, “In English, a double negative forms a positive.
But in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, in no language in the world can a double positive form a negative.” But then a voice from the back of the room piped up, “Yeah, right.”
It’s funny because: “Yeah” and “right” are affirmative words in the technical sense, but combine these two positives and you get a deeply-sarcastic, “Yeah, right.”
9. What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
It’s funny because: Well, this one doesn’t actually require an answer because a rhetorical question doesn’t require a direct answer by definition. Ha!
10. How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? A fish.
It’s funny because: Surrealism is a movement that is solely based on creating weird, illogical pieces of art. As this joke makes no sense, it is itself a surrealist work.. of art.
11. First Law of Thermodynamics: You can’t win.
Second Law of Thermodynamics: You can’t break even. Third Law of Thermodynamics: You can’t stop playing.
It’s funny because: It’s a total reductionist take on the true laws of thermodynamics, and the language used implies that life is not worth the hassle. In plain terms, the laws of thermodynamics are: Energy cannot be created nor destroyed; things tend to move from order to chaos; and the lower the temperature gets, the less chaotic things become.
12. A Roman senator comes into the senate fifteen minutes late one day.
Cicero is up front making a speech, so he creeps into his seat as quietly as possible and whispers to the guy next to him, “what’s he talking about?” The guy replies, “I don’t know, he hasn’t gotten to the verb.”
It’s funny because: Cicero was famous for his exceptional oratory skills which involved long periodical sentences. His long sentences and love for delaying the verb for emphasis took him longer to come up with a reply.
13. “This is the sort of English up with which I will not put.”
It’s funny because: This sentence, with varying versions often attributed to Winston Churchill, is a response to the well-known rule in English that a sentence is not supposed to end in a preposition. By crafting the sentence this way, the speaker is correct technically, but it is an extremely awkward way to talk.
14. C, Eb, and G walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, no minors.”
It’s funny because: C, Eb, and G are the musical notes that make a C-minor chord. Yeah…
15. Never tell a pun to a kleptomaniac. They are always taking things literally.
Kleptomaniacs are known for their impulse control disorder that results in an irresistible need to steal things. If you tell them a joke, they will take it…literally. :)))
We hope you’ve had some fun with these jokes. Do you know of any that we may have missed? Let us know by joining the conversation in the comments and please share this article if you’ve enjoyed the read.