Love. It is the answer to all of our questions, and the destination we are all searching for.
Love has many definitions and many different faces. You can find it in various forms and unexpected places. That’s how powerful it is.
The noted psychologist Robert Steinberg may have found a way to explain this mysterious force and put it into an easy to read system. He has created a transparent Triangular Theory Of Love.
In his theory, Steinberg points out the three essential components of love – passion, intimacy, and compassion.
The different variations of the combinations between those elements give us the 7 different types of love. Here they are:
1. Passionate but infatuated love.
You know that feeling when you fall madly in love with someone, and everything seems so passionate and intense? But later on, when the spark fades away, the passion fades too. This is what psychology calls infatuated love. In the beginning, it feels overpowering and accelerated, but it is short-lived without any commitment or intimacy.
Just like the power of lust, infatuated love makes you feel like you can do anything for the other person. However, you need to be very careful and see if your partner is as committed to you, as you are for them.
2. Romantic love.
Romantic love is when you and your partner have both deep intimacy and passion for each other. This is the time when there are butterflies in your stomach, and all you can think about is your significant other. This type of love makes you feel excited and gets you goosebumped every time you see your loved one.
It feels truly magical. However, you should have in mind that if there is no serious commitment, this love may become short-lived too.
Who is the person you tell everything to? Think of the one who is always there for you. The special someone you can’t wait to talk to whenever something exciting or troublesome happens. You love them, right? Of course, you do. But you love them like a dear friend. This type of love is more liking than romantic loving. It’s still beautiful though.
4. Compassionate love.
When there is intimacy, alongside genuine commitment, there is compassionate love. However, when it comes to compassionate love, the passion in the relationship is not as much as in the other types of love.
This happens often in long-term romantic relationships. The passion eventually fades away. But this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. The intimacy and commitment you have are strong enough to keep your love alive. Well, you still need to rekindle the fire between one another from time to time.
5. Fatuous love.
In fatuous love, you have passion and a strong will to commit to your partner, but there is no real intimacy.
Imagine this. You fall for someone new. There is wild chemistry between you two, and you can’t take your hands off each other. It seems almost perfect so far.
As you feel like you’ve finally found the one, there is still something essential missing. That’s the intimacy. The fact that you like the same artists, and read the same books simply isn’t enough. The truth is, without intimacy you can never truly connect to one another.
6. Empty love.
This kind of love is when you still feel a powerful sense of commitment toward someone, but there is no passion or intimacy between you. For instance, you share this love with your family members. While you see this person as an inevitable part of your future, you have no sexual attraction to them.
Sadly, this empty love happens also to many married couples who have lost the feelings of passion and affection for one another.
7. Consummate love.
The ultimate combination of the three powerful elements – intimacy, passion, and commitment, is called consummate love. This is the utmost situation, where you and your partner have an amazing emotional and physical connection with one another.
Consummate love is when the two of you are best friends, passionate lovers, and true soulmates. Plus, you can’t imagine your future without being side by side till the very end.