“We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.” – Sam Keen, To Love and Be Loved
A match made in heaven filled with only a seemingly perfectly romantic, happy end love story?
Realistically speaking, that is not possible, nor is it worthwhile.
A relationship deemed ‘perfect’ on the outside is typically only a mere illusion, having nothing to do with reality.
And what is perfect, to begin with? It’s an unattainable standard some of us may put on ourselves, our relationships, or our path in life. However, it is actually not worth striving towards that illusionary goal which, in turn, would not satisfy us as humans.
Well, because we do not need ‘perfection’ to survive, nor to feel happy.
We need something that is real, not perfect.
And real means substance. A combination of ups and downs, smiles and tears…you know, genuine emotions that are there on a daily basis. In truth, no relationship is ever perfect or unbreakable.
The fact of the matter is that every relationship can indeed go through tough times and break at some points. Moreover, it has to go through difficulties in order to form a real, strong partnership.
Every relationship needs the challenges to grow and evolve.
Relationships that grow and evolve are the keepers. The reason behind this is that a strong bond that matures over time is far better that one that remains static.
The quiet and silence of a so-called ‘perfect’ relationship is nothing compared to the dynamics, the passion of a relationship that allows vulnerability, fights, as well as the potential to fall apart and get back up: that is where growth has a chance to happen.
A relationship that makes you feel alive.
To get in the way of growing as a couple out of the fear of ‘messing everything up’ becomes monotone and inauthentic quickly.
Is this the ‘perfect’ ingredient to an even more perfect ‘relationship’?
No, not by any means. It could be comfortable, it may be convenient, however, it will not make you feel vibrant, passionate, or even adventurous.
Perfect is not a representation of love. It is far from even describing it.
Why do we seek after the ‘perfect’ match?
We as humans tend to think that we should achieve a certain level of ‘perfection’ before we become happy or before we decide to settle down. Nevertheless, perfection is something we feel deserving of but is simultaneously nothing we should strive for, in all honesty.
Hence, it is important to find a significant other or life partner who is understanding of the fact that ‘perfection’ is something we forever strive for but is never attained.
Having that mindset makes an individual continuously work on the relationship through thick and thin, overcoming the bad.
In other words, that is a person that will never give up on you even in the most ‘imperfect’ of consequences and difficulties that may come your way.