What do you think might be the worst possible punishment for a narcissist?
.A public announcement of all the skeletons in their closet? Being dumped by the love of their life because they finally woke up to what a terrible person the narcissist is, and swore to never have anything to do with them again? Their family and children distancing themselves from them because they are so sick of their behavior? Having no support from any friends because their friends all got tired of dealing with them and took off?
Given that narcissists become who they are through using techniques such as gaslighting, deception, and manipulation, it’s somewhat surprising they’re not found out more frequently.
They can also, however, try to do things to make up for these behaviors, or at least humanize them a little more, like being overly generous, complimentary, or indulgent. These behaviors are just in place, however, to try to make them look less narcissistic.
So what is the greatest punishment for a narcissist?
They go through life on top of the world, as far as they’re concerned. Sure, they might have to buy a diamond necklace or a set of golf clubs here and there for cheating on their significant others, but that’s totally normal, right? Why wouldn’t a guy buy his wife jewelry, or a gal get her husband the best clubs on the links? They may consider that they don’t really have much of a relationship with their children, but hey, that’s the kids’ fault, especially as they grow older. Just because Mom or Dad wasn’t around when they were young, doesn’t make it their responsibility once the kids reach a certain age, right? Narcissists typically take positions of power -CEOs, Presidents, politicians, etc.- because they feel they deserve it, and they feel that they excel there. Nobody else could possibly do the job as well as they do.
The greatest punishment for a narcissist isn’t the loss of love by any family member or friend.
It’s not even the loss of treasured material possessions…though they do feel a major blow when they face such a loss. It’s not even the loss of their job, their position of power (though it does sting to lose that, too). No, the greatest punishment for a narcissist is their own sorry existence.
How’s that, exactly?
Well, think about what it would feel like to wake up as a narcissist every day. For all of the bluster and bravado, their egos are thin shells covering up an enormous amount of fear, sorrow, pain and misery. For all of their apparent confidence, they live in a realm of constant fear. Imagine being afraid all the time, and creating deceptions and lies to mask your fear, to try to overcome it. Except narcissists have no way of overcoming it; fear is the driving force in their lives. That is how their meager existence is their worst punishment.