“Even if you cannot change all the people around you, you can change the people you choose to be around. Life is too short to waste your time on people who don’t respect, appreciate, and value you. Spend your life with people who make you smile, laugh, and feel loved.”
― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart
One of the most terrible things one can go through is the feeling of betrayal – having put your trust into someone enough to be able to them how your ex-partner mistreated you, just for them to go ahead and treat you the exact same way.
Being able to lower your guard and trust someone to not take advantage of you is an incredible feeling, but it can be quite frightening. Every fiber of your being wants to believe that they will not cause you pain.
You want to fully give yourself to them because your love is deep and you give people in your life the benefit of the doubt. You trust them until they turn around break your heart.
You are used to holding on to love for much longer than you should. Regardless of how much pride and love you have for yourself, you give even more of it to your romantic partner.
That is the reason why betrayal coming from a person you have given your heart to is so painful.
Because you trusted them enough to expose your vulnerabilities. Nothing can cause more pain than being disappointed by the one person you believed would never hurt you.
Being hurt so deeply changes you in ways you could never imagine. Not all bad experiences only make you stronger, some can destroy who you are, and turn you into a different person.
One of the most difficult decisions you will ever be faced with is having to accept the fact that just because you love them does not mean that they can be with you.
But the person who caused you the most pain is the one you actually need to thank.
If it hadn’t been for their behavior, you would have kept on accepting being mistreated. If it wasn’t for them, you would have kept believing in such people. If they did not show you their true face, you would have kept believing that they were someone they actually weren’t.
Had they not kept pushing you around, you would not have gained the wisdom to understand when to say enough is enough before it is too late.
Because they disrespected your value, now you are fully aware of what you’re worth.
It does not hurt because they never loved you. It hurts because you thought they did. You believed that you meant the same to them as they did to you.
You did not think they would ever leave. When they said you were the best for them you thought they also meant that you would be the last.
Forgive yourself for not knowing what you didn’t know and make a promise to use your newfound knowledge to protect yourself better in the future.
Time shows whether we were right or wrong about a person, not how much we love them. It helps us separate the good ones from the bad ones. It gives the bad ones the opportunity to show their true face regardless of what your expectations are.
Get to know yourself better and take back control of your life. Discover happiness while spending time with quality friends, and stop giving the right love to the wrong people.
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