10 Mistakes to Avoid During a Breakup
Breaking up is never easy. Besides, most of the times it seems like there is no right way to do it. But at least you could do it maturely and concerning the other person. Indeed, there are plenty of ways you could mess things up. For instance, breaking up through a text message or being extremely mean in order to avoid being the vulnerable one.
However, there are certain things you could avoid to handle the breakup and make it as smooth and harmless as possible.
Here are 10 of them.
1. Draw attention to all the reasons you weren’t happy.
Most probably, you decided to break up with your partner because you weren’t feeling happy in their company anymore. However, this doesn’t mean you should remind them every little thing they messed up while you were still together. Unnecessary drama during the breakup will be painful for both of you.
2. Tell everyone else before telling your partner.
It is okay to seek the advice of a close friend, but you should definitely avoid telling everyone else. Out of respect for your partner, you should tell them first about your decision. Hearing about your choice to end things from someone else might severely hurt their self-esteem and put them in an uncomfortable position. So, if you have mutual friends, keep them out of the situation, until you clear things out with your soon-to-be-ex partner.
3. Point out everything you don’t like about them.
Listing all of your partner’s flaws will lead to nothing good. The second you tell them you want to go on your own separate journey, it is clear that something about them was off for you. It is extremely unnecessary to tell them everything that annoyed you about them. There is no need to insult them or act offensive towards them.
4. Breakup via text.
This is probably one of the most selfish and disrespectful ways to end a relationship. Maybe it seems easier at the moment, but ghosting the person you once were in love with is extremely offensive. At least have the decency to break up with your partner by having a face-to-face conversation.
5. Talking rude about them after breaking up.
Leave the insulting and rude comments about your ex for yourself. After all, once you were amazed by them, you loved them, and you chose to be with them. Avoid talking bad about them, especially in front of mutual friends. Have in mind that whatever you say might backfire and hurt the both of you.
6. Say “Let’s stay friends.” just to avoid hurting their feelings.
Maybe friendship after a romantic relationship is possible, but that’s definitely not the most common occasion. Promising your partner to keep in touch and stay friends after you break up is not going to magically heal the wound in their hearts you just opened. What’s more, you should absolutely avoid saying this if you don’t genuinely mean it.
7. Sabotage the relationship intentionally, forcing them to end it.
If you have already decided you don’t want to be in a relationship with your partner, be honest about it. Don’t play with their minds, leading them to this decision. It is much better to face your feelings and share them with the other person, rather than making them appear the bad one in the situation.
8. Leaving without explaining anything.
Don’t leave your partner without explaining your reasons to do so. They deserve to know what they did wrong or what made you come to the conclusion you want to end your relationship. Before you tell them you decided to break up with them, be sure you have a direct explanation.
9. Stay in touch after breaking up.
Seriously, delete your ex’s number already. Block them on social media. Staying in touch will seriously damage the heartache healing of both of you. Close the tab of your past relationship already. You need to make space for the new things in your life, and to remind yourselves that you are two able individuals with your own dreams and goals.
10. Get involved with someone else right after your breakup.
Being alone after a heartbreak is tough. However, this doesn’t mean you should immediately rush into another relationship. Getting attached to someone else right away might severely damage your healing process after the breakup. Give yourself a little time to clear your headspace and regain your energy.