I have always done whatever I can to be seen as a good person by others. And that is both my biggest flaw and my biggest virtue. I never rush to judge others, but my heart has been hurt so many times by trying to make other people happy and forgetting about my own needs and desires.
These days, however, I feel that there is a serious change happening in me.
It’s like I’m transforming into another being. I can feel it. There is a change happening and I feel it deep in my guts. It feels like I’m shredding my old shell to replace it with a new one.
Thankfully, I am starting to feel at ease with who I truly am as a person. And now I realize that I wasted so much time by avoiding to be myself. And I am finally starting to be at peace with what’s underneath.
I am coming to terms with the fact that others don’t care as much as I’d like them to.
And I don’t have the time to compare myself to others anymore. I’ve come to a point in my life where I don’t care what others think of me because I know that if I don’t love myself nobody else will either. I don’t have the time to obsess over the lives of others and harbor secret jealousy for the things they have and I do not. Life is just too short to be lived that way.
I am aware that I may not be the best-looking and smartest person around, but I’m alright with that. Actually, I’ve never been either of those things, but the beautiful difference is that now I just don’t care.
I don’t wish to stalk people online anymore and look at their daily updates looking for possible evidence of betrayal.
I know if they want to be with me they will be with me. And I no longer have the time to play around and overthink everything. My time and energy are too precious for such things.
Also, I know that no matter what happens I will be fine because I’ve always found ways to stand back up when life knocked me down.
I no longer have time for people who don’t respect me, and next time someone tries to belittle me, they better be ready. Because this time I will hold my ground.
I won’t fall for the tricks of narcissists and manipulators anymore and I am making it clear, I’ve learned to spot such people from miles away. So don’t even try.
I have realized how important my loved ones are to me and it’s not because I’m realizing that they won’t be around forever but because now I have my priorities straight.
I have had my fair share of struggles that taught me what matters most in life and that is most definitely love. Hence, it is crucial to tell those around you how much they truly mean to you, how much you love them and how happy you are to have them by your side.
I don’t worry about what will come next because worrying too much about things that are not in my control is pointless.
I know that no matter what happens I will celebrate it – if positive – and find a way to deal with it – if negative. Until then, I will remain calm and at peace with myself.
I will also not settle for an average life filled with average people anymore. I’ve had enough of that. I will improve my life and give my heart and soul only to those who truly deserve it. And I will not settle for anything less than true love.
I will try to be perfect no more and I will never again act like everything is alright when it is not.
We are all allowed to have bad days and I will not pretend to be happy if I don’t feel that I am.
I am finally taking full ownership of both my positive and negative aspects.
And if you have found the strength to do so too, I congratulate you. You’ve made it. You are a much stronger and more resilient person because of all the suffering you’ve had to endure.
And now, it is your time to enjoy life to the fullest.
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