5 ‘flaws’ that just make you more attractive to people
“You are imperfect, permanently and inevitably flawed. And you are beautiful.” ― Amy Bloom
It is safe to say that sometimes the things we are most insecure about are actually the ones that make us unique and charming to others. It’s no wonder, as we are very self-conscious creatures and have the tendency to pick ourselves apart at times.
However, the listed below character ‘flaws’ are here to prove to you exactly how little we understand people’s perception of us.
Take a look!
1. You feel ’embarrassed’ very easily
One may believe that feeling visibly uncomfortable or embarrassed because of something silly we have done is a humiliating quality. However, it is quite the opposite, as in reality that makes up for a very lovable personality due to the vulnerableness shown.
Could you believe there are people who resort to surgery in order to remove the nerves responsible for blushing and sweating?
As unpleasant as embarrassment could be for the individual affected by it, other people seem to find it attractive. According to research on the matter, it is estimated that people who show signs of embarrassment are generally received as more cooperative, trustworthy and generous, thus making them more desirable for other people.
As opposed to indicating weakness or a lack of social skills, ’embarrassment’ seems to more likely signal loyalty and reliability. Consequently, that makes ’embarrassment-prone’ people very good romantic partners, capable of remaining faithful.
2. You share ‘a lot’
No, this doesn’t suggest sharing too much of your personal information or having no boundaries whatsoever- that is clearly problematic.
However, having the tendency to open up more to people, is not automatically a bad quality to have, especially in the sense of developing strong, healthy relationships. As per the ‘social penetration theory‘, the gradual ‘disclosure’ of personal details about oneself is a vital step towards the achievement of closeness and intimacy.
3. You’re brutally honest
Of course, this quality is a two-edged sword. Nonetheless, it is indeed an appreciated feature, as it exhibits a straightforward, honest nature, regardless of the harshness of the truth.
More so, the authentic expression of feelings and opinions are emphasized as a highly valuable quality, even if they may lead to more ‘heated discussions’ or full-blown arguments.
It is argued that unleashing negative emotions can be, depending on the circumstances, quite helpful to the sustainment of healthy, fulfilling relationships.
However, this should not serve as a cover-up for a negative pattern of behaviors.
4. You’re a bit clumsy
Being just a little pinch of awkward or clumsy is not as bad as one may initially suppose. In actuality, it makes your character seem more ‘human’ and relatable to others.
In a study published in the journal Psychonomic Science, scientists have discovered that being ‘uncoordinated’ at times can make you more appealing and approachable. Of course, that is if you are still deemed ‘competent’ in the eyes of society.
Certainly, you might feel awkward in the given situation (whatever it may be), however, bear in mind that people might think otherwise.
Nobody likes to gossip, right?
Research on the matter suggests quite the opposite. Of course, with this, we stray away from malicious gossip with the intent to hurt a person or anything of that magnitude.
However, it is evidenced that there is a type of gossip that is specifically ‘designed’ to shield others from harm by warning them about certain people and situations. So, sharing information about disloyal friends, potentially unfaithful partners, or dishonest employers may be deemed in some circumstances as ‘unimportant’ or ‘superficial’, however, it does serve a purpose.
To share this ‘prosocial’ gossip with others, in actuality, signifies that you care about the person and you trust them and, therefore, you feel closer to each other as a result. However, in order for it to be a ‘good’ gossip one must learn to differentiate between useful and/or entertaining and destructive forms of said gossip.
In conclusion, you may now rest assured that when you spilled that drink on your colleague that one work party and you apologized profusely after that…well, you might just be the new ‘colleague of the year’ in the eyes of everyone there.
Jokes aside, it is evidenced by various research that the aforementioned ‘flaws’ actually make us more personable, approachable, charming, as well as trustworthy and honest as people.
So, don’t be so hard on yourself next time when you’re pondering about it.