Are you and your partner making fun of each other and not getting offended?
If the answer is yes, then you’re probably living a happier life in a more fulfilling relationship, research has found.
Playful mockery at the expense of your significant other can do wonders in terms of keeping your relationship fresh. Unfortunately, some people are only good at making jokes but terrible at receiving them. And, as it turns out, the way this type of banter makes you feel might be an indication of whether or not you’re satisfied with your relationship.
Humor is a source of longevity.
A University of Kansas study has found that couples who can joke with one another in a loving way have the strongest and most enduring relationships. Head researcher Jeffrey Hall, who led 39 studies with more than 15,000 people over a 30-year period is the one who made the discovery. He took a close look into the factors which could potentially make a relationship strong, and which could cause it to fall apart. The findings showed that a sense of humor between partners was a crucial factor for the longevity of the relationship.
And as soon as he made that finding, he set his sights on understanding what kinds of humor worked best when it came to the strength of the relationship.
The research concluded that people’s specific ability to find the same things funny was key to their relationship’s long-term success, rather than just any type of humor.
“People say they want a sense of humor in a mate, but that’s a broad concept. That people think you are funny or you can make a joke out of anything is not strongly related to relationship satisfaction. What is strongly related to relationship satisfaction is the humor that couples create together,” Hall told Distractify.
Couples coming up with insider jokes helps reinforce their relationship and allows them to get closer and know each other better. It also helps them feel more comfortable in each other’s company.
A shared sense of humor can even affirm both you and your loved one’s faith in your relationship with the help of comedy.
This is also applicable for couples who poke fun at each other, as long as it’s all coming from a good place. Hall calls this ‘relational humor’.
“Playfulness between romantic partners is a crucial component in bonding and establishing relational security. Particularly shared laughter is an important indicator of romantic attraction between potential mates,” he says.
Another thing the study found is that the success of a relationship is linked to a good sense of humor evaluation, which is one person’s judgment of their partner’s sense of humor.
The findings showed that when one of the partners thought their other half had a good sense of humor, they had a tendency to believe that their partner was simply a good person, or that their relationship was going great.
In addition, the study also looked into the kinds of humor that can impact relationships in a negative way and found that aggressive and self-defeating humor were two kinds that were linked to dissatisfaction.
This means that if your partner constantly jokes about your looks in a condescending way or does so about their own flaws, your relationship might not last long. But if both of you find common ground when it comes to the things you laugh at, your relationship has the potential to see a happily-ever-after.
In the following series of Tweets, Blake Lively and Ryan Raynolds show us how it’s done 🙂
Do you and your partner poke fun at each other? Share your experiences and thoughts on the topic by joining the conversation in the comments and please share this article with your friends and family if you’ve enjoyed it.