Contentment with the Unknown
“The Way of Being Lost” is an inspirational memoir that shares the candid moments lived by Victoria Price. Despite a period of personal circumstances, Price was able to share ways in which she manages to cope through tough moments while still managing to live her best life. Her story recollects moments during a time where she had to rebuild her life in order to truly rediscover herself. I had the opportunity of interviewing Victoria Price, and I was able to learn so much about the beauty in losing yourself in order to find your truest self.
If your interested in knowing more about Victoria Price’s journey, I recommend reading “The Way of Being Lost”. It’s truly an inspiring story that connects with readers from all walks of life.
Your memoir is very inspiring. What encouraged you to share your story?
Human beings learn through story. I have been so grateful to the brave people who have shared their stories of both their struggles and their triumphs with the rest of us. Their stories have made me feel less alone — and have given me the courage to face my fears. So I am merely paying it forward. When we are going through dark times, we often want to hide away in fear and guilt and shame. It can feel so hard to reach out and ask for help. So sometimes help can only come through the story shared by a stranger. If my story or my words can help even one person through a dark night of the soul, then this book will have served its purpose in the world.
After going through many struggling events, do you still fear the idea of losing it all or have you found peace in the unknown?
I have found that chronic fears are the hardest ones to get rid of. They worm their way under our skins and into our subconscious, and we come to live with them unknowingly, like a slight limp of the soul. So when I am struggling, OF COURSE, those same old same old fears rear their ugly head. The difference is that now I recognize them more quickly for just what they are — false evidence appearing real. And that helps me invite Love in to clear them out. Which is what Love does! Then, even if though I don’t know how the story ends, I trust that it is being written in Love.
Does age matter when it comes to rediscovering your truest self? Would it be beneficial to know your truest self within your twenties compared to your forties?
I began my journey searching for my truest self in my twenties, but it was harder to let go of caring about so many of the things that block our connection to our truest selves. When we are in our twenties, all the shoulds of the world can seem to weigh much more heavily on us. We believe them! As we get older, we have a choice — to expand into love or contract into fear. When we expand, we begin to release all those shoulds. But most people contract more and more into fear. I would not be here now if I had not started my journey in my twenties. We begin our road trip to our truest selves the moment we realize we have lost our way and want to find it. Whenever that happens is exactly the right moment — and the most important thing to remember is that it is never too late.
In your book, you say its important to leave everything behind in order to find yourself. Can you elaborate on why it’s so important to leave everything behind in order to establish this ‘sense of self’?
It is important to know that the “self” we are seeking is not the constructed self of the ego, which is all about accumulated knowledge, experiences, and even virtues. What we have to be willing to leave behind are all the things the world has taught us to value — power, prestige, possessions, privilege. This is not to say that we will all end up penniless pushing shopping carts, but rather that what we invest in will be very different. When we begin to release our investment in the identities that we have been told to accumulate — our job titles, our net worth, our relationship status — we realize that a lot of those things never brought us the peace of mind or joy we had hoped.
Underneath all that are our true selves — and our true selves speak the language of the heart. From our hearts, we connect with one another without competition or judgment. We don’t have to worry about doing good in the world because we are good. We don’t have to look for love because we are loving. When we move through the world this way, it is about the least selfish thing we can do, because we are not staking out our isolated little claims for space or meaning or purpose. We are loving the world, one another, and ourselves whole. This is what our planet needs — for us to love the world whole.
What are some ways in which someone can take the steps to rediscover and find contentment in their lives?
I can only speak to what has worked for me. The most important thing has been developing a daily and deliberate, committed and consistent practice of joy. This means that I show up every day to experiencing, expressing, and sharing joy. As an entrepreneur and workaholic, I have had to figure out how to silence that voice in my head that tells me I always have too much work and never enough time to do it. So I make time every morning for my spiritual practice, which consists of prayer, contemplation, and deep spiritual reading and journaling. I try to find time to cook healthy meals that I enjoy. I spend time with my dog. I take long walks and try to practice being deeply present. And I photograph, which always helps me see more deeply. Listening to soothing music while I work is also very important. These are all small things, but they add up to a daily and deliberate, conscious and committed practice of joy.
Are there any positive coping mechanisms/mantras that you found pushed you through your toughest moments?
Yes, I have lots!
When things are toughest, I usually want to isolate. Pushing myself to call others and talk things through or ask for help is huge. I journal — I write out what is scaring me and what I know to be true.I pray in all kinds of ways that I have learned over the year — from repeating one word that soothes the fear of mantras that I have learned that soothes me. I get outside and look up at the sky and listen to the birds and walk. I read things that break the mechanism of fear and remind me of the power of Love.
What advice would you give someone who’s currently feeling lost and wishes to find inner peace in their lives?
When fear surfaces, it is always a sign that you have not chosen something from a place of love. Instead of being afraid of the fear, try to go beneath it and feel where you have blocked love. Invite that love back in. That sounds simplistic, but it actually works. Your mind will want to tell you that it’s impossible, but inviting the love beneath the fear back in will get you back on the path to peace and healing. For example, if there is a situation at work where you feel conflict or pressure or unhappiness, instead of rehearsing all the ways in which your fear or anger or unhappiness is justified — which it will always try to make you feel it is — go beneath all of that and try to reconnect with love. Keep it simple. Try making a list of everything you are grateful for about your job, your co-workers, or even something right in front of you — like your office supplies.
Gratitude will begin to shift everything. From that place, try to reconnect with any parts of your work or your work environment that bring you joy, and commit to showing up to that joy every day. However small or simple it may feel, show up to that joy every day. Finally, little by little, make the time and space to look for the good in the people or situations or structures that seem the most frustrating. Sometimes that can feel really hard. But keep looking. Because once you reconnect with gratitude, joy, and the good, you will find that your own experience has begun to shift. And from there, from a place of more love and less fear, clarity and peace and hope and healing begin to come. As we choose to love, love emanates out from us and transforms our daily experience. This is not pie in the sky. It works! A daily practice of gratitude, joy, and looking for the good invite in the love that guides as all back home to our hearts.
Many thanks to Victoria Price for being generous with her time and insights. Be sure to check out her new book “The Way of Being Lost”.