7 traits most toxic people have in common
We have all suffered from the ill-behaved influence of a toxic person.
At some point in our lives, we have all been caught up in some nasty little mind game where our patience and trust in people has been mistaken for weakness. But no matter how harmful this experience was, it taught us that not everyone comes into our lives with good intentions. Some people are there just to remind us that we should always be careful to whom we vent.
And after all the struggle and pain we go through while dealing with toxic people, we realize they all have quite a few things in common.
Here are 7 of them:
1. They are manipulative.
Usually, toxic people get what they want using vicious little mind games. They play with your feelings and manipulate you into thinking or doing whatever they want you to until they get bored and move on to their next toy. It doesn’t matter if it’s a family member or a romantic partner – all toxic people are skillful manipulators. The best way to escape from their deceitful games is not to play.
2. They never apologize.
Why would they? Being talented manipulators comes with a perk – they always know how to make things look like they did nothing wrong, even if they were in the center of everything. Somehow, they manage to enchant everyone around them, playing the ‘victim’ card, so they can get out of any situation like innocent baby angels. Until someone with a higher level of emotional intelligence teaches them a lesson and shows them their trickery cannot work forever.
3. They are judgemental.
Toxic criticism. That’s when a toxic person starts criticizing you even if they have no idea what you’ve been through. They are going to judge you even if they know nothing about you. And when they cannot find anything wrong with you, they will make things up just to crush you. That’s because bringing others down makes these immoral beings feel good about themselves in the most hideous way possible.
4. They never take responsibility.
Whether it’s about their actions or their feelings, toxic people will never admit they are responsible. Instead, they will find a way to project their feelings onto you. They will even try to convince you that you somehow provoked them, so you are to blame for their actions. What’s more, if you don’t have much experience with such people, they can also make you believe it was all your fault. Seeing you defending yourself over something they did, will only make them feel as if they can control you.
5. They need 100% of your attention.
Insecurity is one of the biggest enemies of toxic people. While treating others like toys, deep inside, they are just some scared little souls that are afraid they are not enough. Their insecurity shows especially when they force you to choose them over someone else. They want your full attention to themselves because the second you decide to spend time with someone else, they feel threatened you might actually come to your senses and realize how they have been fooling you all this time.
6. They are interested in you only if it benefits them.
It shouldn’t come as a surprise that toxic people are not caring or compassionate. Well, they might show some interest in the things that matter to you, but there will definitely be something in it for them. They can even do good, but in the end, there will surely be some other nasty reason behind their benevolent deeds. As much as you want to believe their intentions are pure, have in mind they can always deceive you.
7. They are inconsistent.
Being around a toxic person is like spending time with several different people at once. They tend to change their attitude as a girl changes clothes when she can’t decide what to wear. One minute, they can be the kindest person you’ve ever met, especially when they want something from you. And the next one, they can act as if you don’t exist. Overall, their behavior depends on what they’re trying to achieve or what they want to happen. Changing their mood so quickly is their form of personally directing their own reality the way they want it to be.
Sadly, it’s a tremendously rare occurrence for a toxic person to admit their mistakes and to be willing to change.
In most cases, their only wish is to drain every last bit of your energy until you no longer serve them. They expect you to be loyal to them, but they show no loyalty to you. They criticize you, but can’t take honest criticism themselves. And when they don’t get what they want, they act as if you were the worst person to walk on Earth.
If you don’t want to be a victim of yet another toxic human being, there is only one thing you could do.
It’s quite simple actually: Don’t play by their rules. Don’t play at all. If you refuse to follow their lead and let them manipulate you, they will have no control over you.