10 prevailing signs of narcissistic behavior and how to handle it
Narcissists are everywhere around us.
They could be a toxic co-worker, a mean relative, a manipulative friend, or a controlling partner. Whatever the relationship is, a narcissist would take advantage of your kindness the second they sense your mind is vulnerable and easy to be controlled.
Even though many people in our lives show vivid signs of narcissism, it is sometimes nearly impossible to tell if someone is being a real narcissist.
Here are 10 common behavioral characteristics that may indicate you’re dealing with a narcissist.
1. Everything is about them.
One of the most common features of narcissists is that they love talking about themselves. In their eyes, there is no one above them. No one is as beautiful, intelligent, or successful as them. The whole world is revolving around them. Although there are rare occasions when they would ask someone else about their day, it would be nothing but an attempt to start a conversation they would shortly turn into a monologue about their own life.
2. They need to control everything.
If a narcissist doesn’t have control over every single aspect of their life, including the people around them, they would simply lose it. Being in charge of everything gives them a sense of power and leadership. It gives them a level of confidence that he’s them feel like they have it all figured out. Most of the time, this confidence is nothing but a thick fence hiding their true fears and emotions.
3. They attract attention by making grand statements.
Narcissists speak loud and big. They love receiving attention and would do anything to do so. Making pompous statements about themselves is one of the most common things they do to attract people’s attention and let everyone know they are worthy of admiration.
4. They cheat.
As everything in the world needs to be about them, using sex as a form of validation is a common trait of narcissists. Oftentimes, a narcissist isn’t pleased with only one partner, so they seek more admiration and acknowledgment in others. Through cheating, they gain some sort of sense of power and self-validation. That’s why many people with narcissistic personalities are frequently in and out of relationships.
5. They manipulate their way out of everything.
Manipulation in the form of playing mind games with the people around them is a common narcissistic behavioral pattern. They see others as nothing but puppets they can pull the strings of. Besides, manipulating others is another source of the sense of control and power they so desperately need in their lives.
6. They constantly pick fights.
Narcissists are always right. Nothing and no one in this world can convince them otherwise. So, when someone tries to confront them or tell them they’re wrong, they become aggressive. They start arguing and fighting without even hearing what the other person has to say.
7. They pay little to no attention when someone else is talking.
When you’re having a conversation with a narcissist, they would often say things like “yeah” and “uh-huh”. They would try to act like they’re listening to you when they are actually thinking either about themselves or about who their next victim will be. You can easily tell when they’re not interested in what you’re saying, as their eyes would glaze over and become noticeably distant while you’re still speaking.
8. They never talk about their true emotions.
When emotions come up, narcissists quickly change the subject. Discussing their true feelings is something they avoid doing even with the people in their inner circle. That’s because they fear telling someone how they actually feel would make them seem vulnerable and weak. If they somehow start talking about emotions, it would most probably be another one of their tactics to manipulate you by using your empathetic nature in their own favor.
9. Physical appearance is one of the narcissists’ top priorities.
Narcissists value physical appearance like no one else does. They feel their best when they look polished. That’s why they take additional time for preparation – from women wearing designer clothes and snatched makeup to men spending hours at the gym. It all takes extra effort, but narcissists have no problem making is, as it would enhance their physical appearance – therefore, their control over others.
10. They often break rules and cross boundaries.
Sometimes, people with narcissistic personalities take life as one giant game. They love playing with the emotions of others. So, when there’s a rule they can break or a boundary they were told not to cross, they would do anything they can to disobey. From simple things like touching a sign that says: “Do not touch!” to extremes like running red lights when no one is watching, they would ignore all restrictions just for the thrill.
What to do if you’re under a narcissist’s influence?
First things first – never put up with it! If the person you have in mind while reading this article has one or more of these toxic traits, they are most likely a real narcissist. To get away from their negative influence, you must stop playing by their rules.
One thing you can do in that direction is to assert yourself. You need to let them know you are a worthy human being with feelings and emotions that deserve to be taken into consideration. Just remember to remain calm and stable while confronting them. Picking fights will never help you break their walls and understand why they behave that way, which is essential for overcoming their toxic influence.