Please, stop mistaking toxicity for love.
They have nothing in common. Yet, people are constantly trying to convince themselves some toxic behaviors are triggered by love. They are putting tremendous effort into making themselves believe that pain is inevitable when it comes to romantic relationships. But this proves only these hopeless romantics are desperate for love and would put up with everything just to be someone’s significant other.
Sadly, far too many people are settling for less just because they are afraid to face life on their own. They have accepted that being hurt is a part of the deal. When their partners are crossing their boundaries, they just step back and try to persuade themselves they deserve such kind of treatment. Unfortunately, when they realize they have been treated so poorly throughout their whole relationship, it is already far too late.
Here are 5 common toxic behaviors that can destroy your relationship if not recognized on time:
1. Being passive-aggressive.
When something about your partner or your relationship, in general, bothers you, say it out loud. Talk to your significant other. Dropping hints and waiting for them to guess what’s on your mind will only enhance the problem. Even if you think that they should know why you’re upset, that’s usually not the case. So, instead of wasting time in ignoring your partner, better cut the act and directly tell them what they did or didn’t do to make you feel this way.
2. Blaming your partner for your own feelings.
Your other half has nothing to do with that annoying co-worker that pissed you off in the morning. It’s not their fault that you spilled your coffee, and you missed the bus. So please, avoid lashing out on them for simply asking how your day was. Take responsibility for your own emotions like an adult, instead of blaming your loved one for things they cannot control even if they wanted to.
3. Turning your relationship into a competition.
Keeping score while in a relationship kills the romance and crosses out every deep emotion you could ever feel for each other. If you’re constantly comparing yourselves, you will inevitably make one another feel bad about themselves at some point, and that’s beyond toxic. After all, love is about sharing, not comparing.
4. Being excessively jealous.
Undeniably, there is a certain amount of jealousy in every relationship. Being a little anxious about your partner’s new hot colleague is not unusual. However, taking it to the extreme by forbidding your loved one to see whomever they want or violating their privacy by going through their phone is unacceptable. This is nowhere near a display of affection. It’s simply toxic, and we must stop normalizing it.
5. Emotionally blackmailing your partner.
Holding your relationship hostage is not an act of love but an attempt of control. It’s choosing to be manipulative and play with your partner’s emotions, rather than being honest with them and tell them how you truly feel. If your perception of being in a couple includes treating your partner like a puppet on a string, then you have no idea what love is.
All these toxic behaviors have one essential thing in common:
If noticed on time, they can all be overcome by proper communication. You and your partner both need to be open with each other and voice your concerns before they turn into a much deeper problem. Sometimes that’s the only way you can save your relationship from falling apart.
