If you are insecure and afraid of rejection like I am…know there is hope!
Many people are so afraid of being rejected and laughed at, that they get in the way of their own happiness. In other words, they avoid doing things out of fear that they may be turned down. This fear could stop them from applying to jobs they want or approaching people they like. Ultimately, it is a fear that can take over your life as it gets in the way of your happiness and growth.
Where does this fear of rejection come from?
According to Adele Wilde, the most common origin of this fear “is the experience of being rejected in childhood by parents and parenting figures […] This rejection may be in the form of outright hostility, neglect due to lack of interest or lack of parenting ability, or, more commonly, parents not understanding their child intuitively – not being ‘tuned-in’.” When we have endured chronic rejection, we begin to suffer from low self-esteem, self-criticism, and self-rejection. Thus, we become insecure and even less likely to pursue the things we want.
If you are insecure and afraid of rejection, there is hope.
Although it may seem as though things will never change, you need to acknowledge that the only reason they will not change is that you refuse to let them. Admittedly, changing your beliefs and behaviors is so much more difficult to do than it is to say. Undoubtedly, learning how to overcome your fears will be a long and challenging journey. Nevertheless, there is hope. Your happiness is in your hands and you have all it takes to live the life you want to.
How do you overcome your fear of rejection?
You may have heard this a million times and if you have, it is only because it is true: the only way to overcome your fear of rejection is to confront it. Nobody believes that this will be easy for you. It is normal to feel anxious and stressed just thinking about confronting your fears. The truth is that this anxiety will gradually, quietly, and subtly decrease with every single time you face your fears. Of course, you will face rejection when you face your fears and unfortunately, you will want to give up. However, every time you stand up after you fall, you will feel stronger. Even when you are afraid and uncomfortable, you will still feel stronger. Eventually, the anxiety will dissipate and the strength will shine through. When this fear of rejection disappears, your insecurities will too.
Fall down seven times.
Stand up eight.
― Japanese Proverb
Just like everybody else, you deserve a life filled with joy. Do not allow yourself to be the only thing standing in your way. You are responsible for the happiness in your life and you have all you need to take control.