Sadly, many people find themselves jumping from one dysfunctional relationship to another, not being able to escape this toxic cycle.
No matter how hard they try to avoid repeating their mistakes from past relationships, they fall into the same trap over and over again. But is there a way to break that loop?
If you are struggling with the same hurtful romantic cycle, here are 6 things you can do to break free:
1. Learn how to recognize unhealthy behavior.
Unfortunately, sometimes it’s almost impossible to detect whether your partner is being genuine or not. However, there are certain red flags you must look out for in order to identify toxic behavior. Some of the most disturbing warning signs are dishonesty, avoidance, emotional or physical abuse, codependency, and jealousy. As soon as you notice such alerting traits in your significant other, try to talk your observations through with them. This will give you a valuable perspective of the strength of your relationship in general.
2. Figure out why you got stuck in the cycle in the first place.
It doesn’t make sense to make the same mistakes over and over again, right? But you still do it. The question is, “Why?” That’s exactly what you need to understand. Usually, we repeat things because they feel familiar and don’t require us to get out of our comfort things. So, there might be a possibility you’ve been doing the same things out of fear of change. Whatever it is, take your time to figure it out.
3. Make an effort to heal your past trauma.
Most of the unhealthy relationships are a result of unsolved problems in the past. Our biggest issue is that we seek healing in people who are unable to help us. Sometimes we must find the path to healing on our own. Unless you have made some steps towards alleviating your emotional trauma, you cannot expect someone else to solve all of your problems. That someone else might not be able to give you the love and acceptance you need, which will only make you feel worse.
4. Practice new relationship skills.
It’s only natural that if you want to end a cycle, you need to change something. In this case, you should focus on changing your relationship skills. This may include improving your communication skills, gaining better control over your emotions, or learning how to set clear boundaries from the very beginning. Even though you start off with baby steps, your efforts will surely be rewarded.
5. Don’t be afraid to be alone.
One of the most common reasons for staying in a dysfunctional relationship is the fear of loneliness. You might prefer to remain a part of such a toxic bond only because this gives you the reassurance that you are at least n a couple and not alone. However, spending quality time on your own will allow you to realize what’s best for you and to reconnect with your true self. Frankly, some relationships force you into losing yourself and forgetting where you come from, which isolates you from the things you genuinely enjoy. That’s exactly why spending time in your own company can help you end the cycle.
6. Treat yourself the way you want others to treat you.
The way you see yourself reflects on the way others see you. If you see yourself poorly by criticizing and doubting yourself, you are showing others that it is okay to treat you with the same negative attitude. On the contrary, if you learn how to love yourself and embrace your true colors, the ones around you will appreciate that. But the most important thing is that you will feel much better after realizing you deserve a genuine connection.