Is your friend really one?
As social creatures we need friends to communicate with, to keep us company and also to help us become more mature. However, sometimes the person we think of as our friend is not a real one because of their toxic personality. Actually, he or she might not even know they are toxic and have bad influence on others.
So, if you feel that your friend is not helping you to progress or is even impending your personal growth, it’s better to keep distance and to pay attention for these 13 facts that reveal you are dealing with a toxic person:
1. THEY NEVER ADMIT THEIR MISTAKES
One of the first signs of a toxic personality is that such people think they are always right. If things don’t go well, they will find somebody else to blame while never searching the problem in them. They are smart enough to present the situation in a way convenient to their perception and make others look guilty. That’s why, be careful and don’t become close with such person.
Logically, if somebody thinks they are never wrong, in a bad situation they will be the ones who
2. PRETEND TO BE A VICTIM
Toxic individuals act as a victim to draw people’s attention and make others feel sorry about their situation when in the same time they may be the very reason for it. So, you shouldn’t easily put your trust in people and should always be careful whether somebody is not tricking you into feeling pity about them.
3. THEY LACK COMPASSION
Compassion is one of the most significant traits of humanity and even villains would have small amount of it. If you your friend does not show empathy for others, you might be dealing with a sociopath – a type of personality even worse than being toxic. Such people are cruel because they don’t understand how others feel and can never walk in somebody else’s shoes. And the worst of all is they might try to fake compassionate behaviour.
4. THEY NEED EGO VALIDATION
Toxic people are insecure and need to be told how good they are. By having their ego boosted they try to hide inner fears. They feel best when shining in the light of other people’s praises about them. If you notice such behavior, don’t doubt it’s a toxic person you are dealing with and need to stay away.
5. THEY JUDGE OTHERS
The most effective way to outshine others, if you don’t possess own qualities, is to reveal their flaws to the world. If your friend repeatedly comments on people’s negative traits, even when it comes to strangers, this person is toxic and is not your friend, indeed.
6. NEGATIVITY IS A WAY OF LIFE
They complain, they judge, they are never happy. They always see the world in its darkest colors and want to make everybody else believe it too. So, if you have a friend who is constantly reminding you how awful this life is, they are toxic and you don’t need them.
7. THEY HAVE BAD ENERGY
Negativity can easily produce bad energy. Don’t you know at least one person who gives you bad vibes even without talking to them? Somebody you don’t feel at ease with? Well, if this is the case, there’s high chance this guy is toxic too.
8. LIES, LIES, LIES
Usually, a toxic person will try to mask their lies or to present them as white ones. However, hiding or twisting the truth all the time means there is something wrong about this person’s perception of reality and we should act prudently with them.
A very dangerous toxic behavior is to manipulate others in order to control them. And if control cannot be imposed a toxic person’s behavior might escalate to the extent they start abusing you – emotionally or physically. If this happens, don’t hesitate to leave the relationship immediately and to ask for help. Don’t forget that both physical and emotional abuse are traumatic experience.
10. THEY ARE THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE
Attention is like a drug to toxic people, so they will try to satisfy their needs for it whenever possible. They might interrupt you while you are talking because they want to express their point of view. They could even play a scene in front of people in public hoping that, for a brief moment, everybody will be looking at them. Pay attention whether you have such friend.
11. THEY HAVE ADDICTIONS
Toxic people usually hide some kind of emotional pain which they want to overcome or relieve. That’s why they get easily addicted to different things. Addictions are dangerous and people who have them need professional help. Unfortunately, sometimes no matter how hard we try to help, it’s not going to work.
12. THEY ARE NOT INTERESTED IN YOUR PROBLEMS
Toxic people are only interested in themselves and they will hardly ever listen to your problems or try to help and understand how you feel. Even if you really want to share something important that bothers you, a toxic person just won’t listen, so give it up and find yourself a better company.
13. THEY ALWAYS INTERRUPT
Unless you talk about them, there is no chance of you having the word for more than a few brief moments. Toxic people will keep interrupting you all the time, trying to change the direction of the conversation until you find yourself discussing their problems not yours.
So, how do we deal with toxic people?
As mentioned in the beginning, toxic people usually don’t realize they are what they are and it is better for you not accept such friends in your close circle. However, you might offer some help. But don’t blame it on yourself, if you don’t succeed or you don’t feel OK to have a toxic friend. Your own happiness always comes first!