We meet different types of people in our lives, and sometimes we are lucky enough to meet the right one. But what happens when it is at the wrong time?
Falling in love is one of life’s greatest joys, especially if it is with the right person at the right time and everything falls into place.
But what if the timing is wrong?
We all have “the one who got away.” You know who I’m talking about. The person you felt an instant connection to, who could make you melt by looking into their eyes. The person who “got you” on an emotional level, understood your eccentricities, and applauded your strengths. The two of you met and you thought, “this could be the one!”
Then, for whatever reason, the timing wasn’t right. Maybe he had to move to a new city for his career, or maybe she had too much going on in her life to invest in a relationship. When neither party has any power over the course of the situation, the reality that it can’t work needs to be accepted.
What if we are missing out on something great?
There is a rather recent addition to psychological terminology, and it is called FOMO, or the fear of missing out.
When we desire a specific outcome and we don’t get it, this can bring about feelings of loss, grief, regret and even hostility. We feel that if we hold on tightly to these feelings, then we still maintain some kind of connection to that ideal image. Instead of focusing on the negative feelings of grief and loss as a security blanket, we should let go and move on with our lives.
You do not want a relationship filled with resentment.
If you just got out of a bad relationship, or had an emotional break up with someone, your heart might not be ready to jump into something new. Even if it is with the right person.
Similarly, if you have an incredible opportunity in life, like overseas career or admittance into your dream school, you may not want to give those up for a possible relationship with someone. You definitely don’t want to find yourself a few years down the line, suffocating in the bitterness that you feel towards them because you didn’t take a chance on yourself.
Even good relationships can turn if resentment is present.
If nothing is wrong, you will create something so you can leave.
If you didn’t want to be in the relationship in the first place, or if they couldn’t be, forcing it to work will only lead to more pain in the end. It seems perfect, and maybe it could be down the line, but not right now. Forcing the relationship to happen will make you happy momentarily but eventually the realization hits you that “this isn’t going to work.”
The painful truth about why we meet the right person at the wrong time.
This is going to hurt, but the truth is that despite how right you think they were for you, they were the wrong person. The right person comes around at the right time, because the right person is timeless.
They will support your dreams and goals and do it right beside you the whole way. You are not at different stages in life, and you are not on opposite emotional wavelengths. There’s no waiting required, and you don’t have to apologize for the life you’ve lived.
What do the wrong people teach us?
In the end, we meet the wrong people to show us what real love looks like. As contradictory as that sounds, it’s true. The wrong people remind us that we are all a work in progress, and as long as we are going through the process of self-growth, we are evolving into the people we need to be.
Love comes around a few different times in our lives, and each time teaches us something new and beautiful.
Have you met someone you would consider to be the right person at the wrong time? What was that experience like for you?