10 Common Reasons Why Men And Women Cheat
Many believe that there is only one reason why someone would cheat; that is, the cheater does not love their partner. However, it turns out that there are various reasons why someone might cheat. Of course, if your partner has cheated on you, you will not care about their reasons why. The only thing you will think and know is that they caused irreparable damage to your relationship. Nevertheless, according to psychologist Joshua Klapow, Ph.D., the majority of people cheat for more than just one reason; more importantly, their decision to cheat usually has nothing to do with their partner. On the other hand, some cheaters have affairs because their partners cannot make them feel content. Dr. Robin Haight confirms this as he says that people cheat not because they want to, but because they are looking for something else. Ultimately, “it can get complicated,” explains Dr. Haight.
There are 10 common reasons why people cheat:
1. They do not feel appreciated
A person might cheat if they feel like they are not being treated how they deserve. If they feel under-appreciated and invisible, they might have an affair with somebody who makes them feel seen, needed, and wanted. It is important to note that this does not mean that their partner is to blame for their infidelity. At the end of the day, nobody can force you to cheat and there are always other solutions to relationship issues.
2. The person struggles with commitment issues
A person might have difficulties committing to a serious relationship and by cheating, they relieve their psychological fear of commitment. What is more, they might be afraid of committing to a single person and may struggle with the concept of monogamy.
3. There is a lack of communication
It can be extremely difficult to have an open and honest relationship when partners do not communicate properly. This may mean ignoring issues, dismissing a partner’s concerns, or being passive-aggressive. If this happens, a person might cheat to either feel heard and seen by somebody else or to get their partner’s attention.
4. They want to break up
Some people are too afraid of saying that they want to break up. They might fear hurting their partners or they may not know how to express themselves. As a result, they might force themselves to stay in a relationship that they no longer want. Eventually, this may result in infidelity as the person looks for something (or someone) else. What is more, some people hope that if/when their partner finds out about the affair, they will break up with them and save them from having to be the ones to end the relationship.
5. There is no spark
Even though two people may love each other deeply, their relationship might lack passion and desire. When this happens, love is unfortunately not enough. No matter how hard two people might try to keep the spark alive, it is sometimes impossible. People who cheat because there is no spark in the relationship do not do so because they do not love their partners.
6. They feel lonely
Loneliness can be brought about by numerous different things (their partner might never be home, they might feel as though they never receive attention, their feelings might be ignored, etc.). Unsurprisingly, if this is the case, their emotional and physical needs will be neglected, dismissed, and unfulfilled. Loneliness can drive people into the arms of others as they seek comfort, attention, and understanding.
7. They have low emotional intelligence
People with low emotional intelligence do not have what it takes to be in a healthy relationship as they do not know how to communicate and express their emotions. Due to their inability to voice their thoughts and feelings, these people will leave their partners unaware that there are issues in the relationship.
8. They have low self-esteem
Those who have low self-esteem constantly seek validation. Their insecurities convince them that the person they are with does not love them enough. Therefore, they look for others who will fulfil their needs, stroke their ego, and make them feel more confident. Of course, this is only a temporary feeling and one that fuels a vicious cycle of infidelity.
9. They have no willpower
There are people who cannot avoid temptation no matter how hard they try. More often than not, they also love their partners and have no issues in their relationships. For this reason, affairs will leave them feeling guilty, ashamed, and disgusted with themselves.
10. They are a narcissist
Narcissists have extremely low levels of empathy and they do not care about their partner’s feelings. More importantly, they have an exaggerated sense of self-importance and believe that they should be treated as though they are special. In other words, they do not believe that cheating is a big deal and they are not concerned with how it will make their partner feel.